It’s Furious Balancing

Two.  At least two.  One lightweight, fluffy, lacy one for when autumn (or spring) days are too chilly to go without a hat, and a denser one for the winter.

Pattern: Crooked Paths Slouchy Hat

Yarn: Berroco Lustra, 50% Peruvian wool, 50% Tencel, Montmarte colorway.  The Tencel gives it a lovely, luminous sheen, which is hard to photograph.  Some knitters on Ravelry had issues with itchiness and/or splittiness, but I didn’t.  Splitty-yarn issues are easily remedied by using super-pointy needles, so this was my first project done on the Addi Lace Click interchangeables.  The yarn softened considerably after being washed in Soak.

Size: One size.  You could play around some with it by changing needle size, but I’m not an expert on doing that.

Needles: US 5 (3.75 mm) and US 8 (5.0 mm)

Mods: None

Those little white bits in the photo — ice crystals.  It was darn cold this morning.

Comments: I love it, and it came out perfectly.  I was somewhat concerned because this was my first project with the Lustra, and I wasn’t certain how it would behave.  I’m seriously considering a pair of mittens to go along with the hat.  I’m normally against the matchy-matchy crap, so I’m going to have to ponder the mittens.  Maybe if if find the perfect pattern…

Pattern: Mitered Mittens from Knitter’s Almanac (May), by Elizabeth Zimmermann

Yarn: Rowan Tapestry in Moorland, a little over one skein’s worth (approx. 145 yards).  You could make them with just one skein if you shortened the cuffs, but the long cuffs are the best part.

Size: Adult small

Needles: U.S. Size 5  (3.75 mm)

Mods: The pattern as written has an “afterthought” thumb, similar to EZ’s afterthought pocket.   Despite the adrenaline rush I get from cutting steeks, I passed on this way of adding thumbs because I think mine would turn out too sloppy for my liking.  Many Ravelers followed the instructions for making a thumb using a gusset method found here.

Comments: I’m fond of these mittens, but I’m thinking I need to make six or seven pairs with self-striping yarn.  I’ve already cast on for a pair in Noro Silk Garden in the light neutrals colorway.

Subtitled:  Because posting my wayward, disjunctive observations is better than posting nothing at all.

1. One of my goals for the weekend to finally, finally, FINALLY complete my body donation information for the University of Tennessee Forensic Anthropology Center.  I need to send in photographs with the paperwork, and I’m wondering if I should give myself a facial beforehand.

1(a). I think I’ve been having more fun playing around with online photo-editing than with trying to select acceptable pictures of myself to submit to UT.  Click for bigger version, if only to see the tombstones on the darker background:

1(b). Once I mail everything off, I will treat myself with a UT hoodie.  I look rotten in orange, so I’m thinking this one or this one.

2. Even though I sometimes complain about how busy I am at work, I truly enjoy meeting and talking with many of my clients.  I had a retired professor suggest that it would be a wonderful idea if you could designate a person in your Will who would be responsible for finishing all the unread books you have in your library when you die.  This adds new meaning to the words “literary executor.”

3. Teh Husband and I bought enough Halloween candy yesterday to pacify ten busloads of preschoolers.  I’m not even going to count the bags.

3(a). 29, not counting the mini Butterfingers for me and the mini Almond Joys for him.

3(b). Something tells me we will have enough chocolate in this house to last until Epiphany.  The number of trick-or-treaters we get at our house is dependent upon the weather.  I remember Halloween in Michigan.  Sometimes we had to wear parkas over our costumes.

4. I’m knitting a pair of mittens for me.

This will eventually turn into a pair of mitered mittens.  One mitten down; one to go.  Thumbs are for last so I can match the colors from the leftover yarn.

The pattern is from Elizabeth Zimmermann’s Knitter’s Almanac, and I’ll do a full write up with yarn info and such when they’re finished.

5. Here’s a photo of Christopher.  Just because.

From time to time, I become besotted with certain yarn.  Sometimes it’s the brand and sometimes it’s the color.  I remember being captivated by a bright orange/pink/gold hank of Alchemy Silk Purse.

I was browsing Ravelry (which is always a dangerous occupation) looking for a lace scarf or shawl pattern, when I saw a project done with Madelinetosh Tosh Merino Light in a colorway called Calligraphy.  It hit my Vintage, Victorian and Retro buttons, so I ordered two hanks of it right away from The Loopy Ewe.

I was not disappointed.

The first thought that came to my mind was “Miss Havisham.” I usually think of her when the autumn rolls around.  A faded bridal bouquet.  The rustle of moldering silk.  Genteel decay.  Shadows.

I’m going to try the Deep Peace shawl/scarf with it.   Try is the operative word.  I know my knitting skills are up to it, but I don’t know about my ability to focus.  Another thing that comes around with the cooler weather is a bad case of Startitis.

Okay, then.  Have I thrown out enough distractions?  Bored the non-knitters to tears?  Maybe I should toss in another photograph, or a bit of poetry…. Whatever it takes to keep the readership down to the knitters and allows me to get to the raison d’etre of this particular post: hand-knit Christmas gifts.

If you’re one of my sisters-in-law (on Teh Husband’s side of the family), stop reading now.

Really.

We mean it.

Click here to continue reading and see the pretty pictures, unless you’re one of my sisters-in-law.  You don’t want this cat to go medieval on your butt now, do you?

It started with the fall catalogs.  I could tell that that this Long, Hot, Miserable, Satan’s Arsehole of a Summer would soon be gone.  Then came the fall knitting magazines, both in print and online.  Sweaters!  Mittens!  Wool!  Cozy stuff!  As soon as I finished the ESTJ Socks, I cast on a lightweight beret for myself.

Pattern: Anthera from Twist Collective.  For a mere $6.00, you get a pattern for a beret, cowl, and cuffs.  Instructions are charted, not written out.  Twist Collective has great charts in terms of legibility and ease of use, so don’t wimp out if you’re chart-phobic.  If you can knit, purl, yarn over, ssk, and k2tog, you can make this beret.  I can’t believe that I’m the only person on Ravelry who has made this beret thus far.

Yarn: Louisa Harding Kimono Angora Pure (70% angora, 25% wool, 5% nylon) in Color No. 6, Teal.  I say it’s Turquoise.  Approx. 90 yards.

Size: One size.

Needles: US size 4 and 5 (3.5 mm  and 3.75 mm, respectively) both Brittany Birch DPN’s and Addi Natura 16″ circular

Mods: None, other than the absence of a dorky i-cord macaroni thingy on top.  I’m not fond of dorky i-cord macaroni thingies, so I just left it out.

Comments: This needed Aggressive Blocking to get it to the point where I thought it had enough slouch to be called a beret.   Aggressive Blocking translates to a full 30-minute soak in Soak and a 10½ inch dinner plate.   The lace pattern really opened up.  If you like a lot of slouch in your berets, I think you could do an additional repeat of Rows 1-12 from Chart A and add about 1½ to 2 inches to the depth of the hat.

This is perfect for fall.  I plan on wearing it with my brown leather jacket and Norovirus Scarf v. 2.0

One of my co-workers  is having a birthday today.  Sometimes I find it rather challenging to work with her because she’s an off-the-charts extrovert and I an on-the-charts-in-the-95th-percentile introvert.

That 95% percentile business is from the Myers-Briggs personality test that’s on the bar graph to the right.  My four-letter personality “type” is an ISTJ.  I had emailed a similar test to my co-worker a few years ago, an she came out as an ESTJ.  You would think that we would get along really well, but I have to tell you that’s just not the case.  The person at the office with whom I get along best is diametrically opposed to me – an ENFP.

Despite this conflict personality-wise I have with the Birthday Girl, I thought it would be a good idea to knit her a pair of socks.  There are several reasons behind this:

• Every time I wear my Tonks’ Socks, she compliments them, my knitting skills, or the cool self-striping sock yarn.
• She’s had a rough year.  Her father passed away not too long ago and her family is, to put it mildly, dysfunctional.
• It would help me get over myself.

So, here they are:

Pattern: Basic Sock Pattern, Ann Budd, The Knitter’s Handy Book of Patterns: Basic Designs in Multiple Sizes & Gauges.

Yarn: Opal Rainforest 6-ply. This is a sport weight yarn, and you can fly through a pair of socks. Of course, it took me three months to finish these because I am… uh… easily distracted by other knitting projects.

Size: Woman’s M/L. I hope they fit!  I had to sorta/kinda guess.

Needles: US size 2.0 (2.75 mm) Brittany Birch DPN’s.

Mods: None.  Even though I do modifications on socks I knit for myself, I needed to follow the generic pattern on this one.  Customizing a fit by guess work is not something I wanted to do.

I’ll take them in to work tomorrow.  They’re all wrapped and ready to go, along with a sample of Soak wool wash and care instruction sheet.  Yep, I’m an ISTJ all right.

I gave these FO’s to my pregnant co-worker  on Friday (which was her last day at the office).  She was pleased with them.  Since her mother knits, she knows how much time/effort goes into a knitted gift.

The problem with Stealth Knitting is that you really can’t do a blog post until the gift is given.  My notes on Ravelry say that I finished the second pair a month ago!

Pattern: Infant Socks by Judy Ellis

Yarn: Shibui Knits Sock in the Lily colorway, 100% merino wool, approx. 70 yards

Needles: US size 0 (2.0 mm)

Size: Bebeh sized.  I really can’t tell if these are too big for a newborn or not, but considering how quickly babies grow, I know they will fit soon.

Mods: I cast on 36 stitches instead of the 40 the pattern called for, and did 2×2 ribbing instead of 1×1.

I made three socks for each of these projects; I just don’t have a photo of all three of the orange ones.

Yarn:  ONline Supersocke 100, 75% wool, 25% nylon, approximately 115 yards.

No mods, same sized needles.

These were an incredibly fast knit and might very well become my go-to baby project.  Knitted socks are (in my mind) more impressive than a plain hat or blanket, since it takes a certain level of skill to knit them.  They are also incredibly cute.  When I was showing them to some of the other people in my office, even some of the men were on the verge of squealing from the Cuteness of It All.

I’ve got another batch of Stealth Knitting underway, but this is Christmas Stealth Knitting.  You’re going to have a bit of a wait.

I’ve finished The Blue Wollmeise Socks.  The depth and intensity of the Blue Curaçao colorway is nothing short of amazing to me.

Information junkie that I am, I did look up blue curaçao in Wikipedia and discovered that the liqueur — made from bitter oranges — is actually colorless.  Further link-clicking divulged that Curaçao is an island off the coast of Venezuela, whose name may have derived from  the Portuguese word for the state of becoming cured (curação).  Oranges.  Sailors.  Scurvy.  You get the picture.

Pattern:  Hermione’s Everyday Socks; the link is to the designer’s blog, for those of you not on Ravelry.   I think this is a great pattern for just about any sock yarn:  semi-solids, wild handpaints, not-wild handpaints, self-striping.  The texture is subtle and the pattern is easy to memorize.

Yarn:   Wollmeise 100% Merino Superwash in the aforementioned Blue Curaçao colorway.  Wollmeise is, indeed, Everything and All That.  These socks have amazing drape, which makes them feel and look “dressier” than any of the other socks I’ve made.  One significant problem with the Wollmeise, though, is that it is a Cat Hair Magnet.  I was constantly using the lint roller on these socks while they were WIP’s.  I couldn’t set them down without them sucking up all the cat hair in a ten-foot radius.

Needles:  Kollage Square DPN’s, US size 1 and 0.  I started with the 1′s, then switched to the 0′s when about 75-80% of the leg was done.

Size:  Women’s Small.  My shoe size is 6½, so I can get away with making a pair of socks AND a scarf out of one skein of Wollmeise.  I am shamelessly smug about this.

Mods:  Cast on 60 stitches instead of 64.  I didn’t do the garter-stitch edging for the heel flap which, in retrospect, was not the best choice.  There is one spot on one of the heels where my half-assed picking up of stitches sticks out like a sore thumb.  My half-assed-ness would be better hidden by the garter stitch.  I console myself with the idea that (a) I could have still had the half-assed-ness even with the garter stitch border and (b) no one will see it while I’m wearing the socks.

I started the next pair of socks almost immediately, using this yarn:

Those colors will help me cope with the awful sunlight and heat.  Three more months…  Gack.  Time to turn up the air conditioning.

I have hit full-blown obsessive sock knitting mode.  Having slogged through the “summer knitting” magazines and e-zines and catalogs — all of them getting excited and breathless about tank tops and “flirty” skirts  made with cotton/linen/bamboo/raffia/wicker — I’ve decided the best way to cope is to crank out a lot of socks.  Wool socks.  Winter socks.  Thick, warm socks that make you wish for the cool, brisk days of October or the frozen, crystalline perfection of a field of freshly fallen snow.

Or something like that.  You call it summer – I call it Three Months of Hell.

I have four pairs of adult socks on the needles right now — one for Teh Husband, two for me, and one for a birthday gift for a co-worker.  I don’t have pictures, mainly because I don’t want to traipse outside  to take photos in 85+ degree weather.   I know one is supposed to suffer for art, but I’m drawing the line right there.

doxy (n) , pl. doxies.   1.  Floozy, prostitute.  2.  Mistress.  Etymology: perhaps modification of obsolete Dutch docke doll, from Middle Dutch.

I must admit that the socks from my prior post have been cast by the wayside like a used Kleenex.  I worked about 4 to 5 inches on the leg when I discovered that the yarn wasn’t up to my standards.  Oh, it had lovely stitch definition and was very soft, but the dye job was sloppy.  I encountered more than a few white spots where the dye didn’t take, or something.  If it was a less intense colorway, this wouldn’t have been an issue, but…   Life is too short to knit with substandard yarn.

I started another pair with the leftover Wollmeise I had from the Isadora Duncan Scarf.  Considering that the scarf used only 1/3 of the skein, I figured I could get a pair of socks out of the remainder.  The Wollmeise is far superior to the other stuff, let me tell you, but it does seem to attract more than the usual amount of cat hair.

The pattern, Hermione’s Everyday Socks, is easy to memorize; the texture is a mixture of knit and purl stitches only.

The Wollmeise socks are making me quite happy, but there are other sock projects preying upon my mind.  I’ve been working off and on on a pair of socks for Teh Husband, and I’m itching to start on a Stealth Sock Project that I want to finish by mid-August.  Teh Husband’s socks are a not-tremendously-exciting semi-solid gray, but the Stealth Socks will be Opal Sockenwolle self-striping goodness.

That’s sport weight sock yarn, mind you, and should knit up in no time at all.  I’ve promised myself not to cast on for them until the first Wollmeise sock is done.  Maybe.

I’ve been making all sorts of bargains with myself about what is a “normal” number of pairs of knitted socks to have in progress at the same time.  Three?  That could be pushing it a little.  I’m such a tramp.

1.  To those of you asking the question, “How much longer can Laiane put off finishing her taxes?” Not much longer.  In fact, about a week.  Maybe.  The thing that bogs me down every year is getting all the charitable deductions tallied up and documented.  Maybe I would be more motivated if we were getting money back, but that isn’t the case.  I have an issue with giving the government interest-free loans.

2.  I like to think that I could find common ground, or at least a conversational topic, with just about anyone, even with The Ultimate Source of Evil in the Universe.  You may refer to him as Dick Cheney.  What could we discuss?  How to shoot someone in the face and make it look like an accident. Then I thought about Sarah Palin, and I drew a complete blank.  Then I thought about what my Gramma Fran would have to say about Mrs. Palin, and I got completely derailed.

3.  I announced on Facebook, but didn’t announce here on Teh Blog, that I have finally paid off all my credit card debt.  It took about 2 years, all told.  Time to start that Emergency Fund that  you’re supposed to have, according to all the financial advisor types.  The problem is, my Emergency Fund is titled Laiane’s Emergency Fund To Get Her Butt to Europe When She Can No Longer Cope with the Lack of Substance in the United States.

4.  Look!  Another sock!

Eventually I’ll feel inclined to write longer paragraphs, or maybe I’ll just go back to posting LOLCats.

I am particularly taken with sock knitting. Socks are practical, beautiful, and endlessly entertaining by their variety. Sock knitting is also very portable and easily stashed in a purse.  I can’t say the same for a sweater.

I’m a top-down, heel flap, DPN kind of sock knitter, which I strangely believe is “more traditional” even though there is a tradition of toe-up sock knitting in Eastern Europe. Or at least I think Eastern Europe is one of several places with a history of toe-up socks, and perhaps the Levantine. I’m a knitter, not a knitting historian.  /shrug

I intend to learn how to knit toe-up socks.  Eventually. I also intend to learn conversational French and Latin ballroom dancing, so there you go.

When I almost-finished the brown alpaca cardigan, I was looking about for an easy, soothing knitting project.   I decided that some German self-striping sock yarn and a k3p1 rib was the way to go.

Pattern: Sock Recipe: A Good Plain Sock in Stephanie Pearl-McPhee’s Knitting Rules.   Not truly a pattern, but guidelines for knitting a sock with any yarn, any gauge, and any needle.  I worked k1p1 ribbing for about an inch, then switched to k3p1 ribbing.  Standard slip stitch heel and basic toe.

Yarn: Meilenweit Magdalena Neuner from Lana Grossa, color 8331.

Needles: US size 1 and 0.  I switched to the smaller needles about an inch before the heel flap to customize the fit.

Size: Small-ish.  Made for a person with gargantuan calves and dainty size 6½ feet.

Mods: I shortened the number of rows in the heel flap by 10-15% since I have “short” heels.

They fit perfectly and, more importantly, Emma approves.

I’ve been getting a deluge of spring catalogs in my mailbox. I do most of my shopping online, so I get a lot of catalogs, let me tell you. They’re mainly for clothing, and I’m seeing the endless parade of women’s clothing in insipid, washed-out pastels. Girly pink. Baby blue. Lavender. Pale yellow.

Ick.

On top of it all, I’m seeing a lot of ruffles and frilly nonsense — nothing I would be caught dead wearing. I will, however, wear lace. Some lace. Not frothy, frou-frou lace, but Lace with a capital “L.” Lace that looks something like this:

Pattern: Strangling Vine Lace Scarf.  The pattern is a four-row lace repeat, which you can memorize easily.  I’ve christened my version the Isadora Duncan Scarf since the friend who gave me the yarn questioned the wisdom of knitting a scarf with the word strangling in the pattern title.

Yarn: Wollmeise 100% Merino Superwash, Blue Curacao, approximately 190 yards.   The intensity of the color is phenomenal.

Needles: US size 3, Addi Turbo Lace.  These are the ne plus ultra of knitting needles.  I cherish mine in a way that’s almost lascivious.

Size: Before blocking: 32″ by 4.25″ ; After blocking 46″ by 4.5″

I get high blocking lace.  It’s the most amazing transformation.  All the lumpy stitches behave themselves and lie flat, and all the yarn overs open up to show off those well-behaved stitches.  I can see the allure of knitting larger lace pieces like shawls and stoles.

I’m wearing this to work tomorrow (I’m thinking with a plain ivory or white sweater).  I want to skip down the hallway,  “Lookit what I made!  Isn’t it awesome?”

Thankfully, my co-workers humor me.

The current theme in my world is Catching Up, or rather, Trying to Catch Up.  I’m so incredibly tired of the long lists of tasks — at home and at the office — that I’ve decided to quit talking about them.  It’s the status quo.  Deal with it.

Nonetheless, here’s an FO from last month that didn’t make it to the blog.  Michelle’s Holiday Scarf.

Pattern: February Lace Scarf by Laura Nixon-Corfield

Yarn: Sock Yarn from The Woolen Rabbit in the Pussywillow Colorway

Needles: US Size 4 (3.5mm)

Size: Before blocking – 6” x 42”   After blocking – 5.5” x 60”

Mods: None

Comments: This is a simple 4-row lace repeat, which makes it easy to memorize.  It also makes it Boring Beyond Belief.  You will be ready to stab your eyes out with your knitting needles after 4 inches of knitting.  Srsly.  The upside, though, is that it looks complicated to a non-knitter.

The recipient, whom I’ve known for over a dozen years, was delighted.  I say that I don’t knit for other people.  The truth is, I do; but it’s an extremely short and exclusive list.